Here you go. My personal top 50 favorite comics from the series.
#50: The Bathroom Scene
from Season 7
"There's somebody I don't know, I ain't going in there."
Something that isn't really my normal type of humor, I went over to the world of female bathroom jokes in one of the final season's comics.
#49: Don't Have Sex
from Season Six
"I guess the moral of the story is obvious: If you're in Downton Abbey, don't have sex. You will get pregnant and you or someone you love will die."
Spoiling the cliched Season 3 of Downton Abbey, Sam points out that whenever there is a baby involved, a character dies. This is actually very true, it goes as far back as Season 1.
#48: Fishing Trip
from Season IV
"Some fishing trip THIS is..."
Sam and Carl go on a fishing trip, only to find themselves on the Orca and being chased by Jaws himself.
#47: Tea Bags
from Season 2 (subset "Harry Potter and the Wait for July 2009")
"Ah! The Cup! Tell me what you see, what does your future hold???"
"Tea Bags"
"...I should have foreseen that."
In the subset where Harry Potter characters wait out the time before their sixth film is released, Professor Trelawney was a constant foil for Sam. One of their best moments was when Sam outsmarted her by using tea bags instead of her traditional tea leaves.
#46: Replacement Sarah
from Season 7
"That was pretty awesome, though. Welcome to the gang, Sara."
I was apprehensive about the amount of characters I was adding in Season 7. However, I realized a golden opportunity after I came up with the concept of Sarah's exit. I knew another girl named Sara, but without an "H", and I thought that could make for a good series of jokes.
#45: Use the force, Ryan!
from Season Six (subset "When Movies Become Reality")
"Force, don't fail me now!"
In their moment of desperation, Ryan uses his new-found Jedi abilities to generate power to the broken 3D Epic TV, thus closing the rift between the real world and the television world. This act of bravery nearly kills him, and he is rescued last second by Sam.
#44: What A Beard Says about a Face
from Season IV
"Some guy at the store asked me if I was Amish."
Towards the beginning of Season IV, Sam, Nick, and Ryan all decide to grow beards. Eventually they reach lengths worthy of Duck Dynasty before shaving them off and donating them to Peter Jackson to be used in the filming of "The Hobbit".
#43: Garth Nayder/ Ryan's Farewell
from Season 7
"Sara said there was some kind of nerd fest going on down here, I figured I'd join in."
It was difficult to write Bailey and Kenzie's farewell scene. Theirs was so short because I didn't want to deal with it, but I knew I had to spend more time with Ryan's goodbye. It ended up being super emotional both in the story and for me personally.
#42: Wizard Board Game Night
from Season 2 (subset "Harry Potter and the Wait for July 2009")
"YOU SHALL NOT PASS GO, YOU SHALL NOT COLLECT $200!"
Sam, Harry Potter, and Gandalf enjoy a nice game of Monopoly, until Harry gets a community chest card that sends him to jail while Gandalf reads him his sentence.
#41: Genie
from Season 2 (subset "Christmas Countdown")
"I am the Genie who lives in the gravy boat. I shall grant you one wish."
"Sweet! I wish for a lifetime supply of Coke!"
"Sorry, that'd be too much work. Any other wish?"
"Well, can you help me understand girls?"
"Do you want regular, cherry, or vanilla Coke?"
When Sam starts dusting off a holiday gravy boat, he finds a Genie that lives inside. When he makes a wish, the genie becomes too lazy to grant it... until Sam asks for something much more difficult.
#40: Student Body Rebellion
from Season IV
"Aren't you a little skinny for a Stormtrooper?"
What starts as a disagreement in the Student Body Council turns into open rebellion when Sam and Sarah form an alliance against President Carl. Carl responds by sending Darth Vader and his two stormtrooper henchmen after them. After Sarah is captured, Sam and Ryan disguise themselves as Stormtroopers to rescue her.
#39: These Aren't the Droids You're Looking For
from Season 5
"Hey Ryan, have you seen my iPod and my iPad?"
"These aren't the droids you're looking for..."
Ryan "borrows" Rachel's iPod and iPad so that he can watch the Bulls and the Bears at the same time. When she finds out, he quotes the famous line from Star Wars.
#38: The Hunger Games
from Season 7
"You're making this sound like it's the Hunger Games."
"Oh it is, and you just volunteered."
Based on true events. At school, there was a social event with pizza and it was all gone in under five minutes.
#37: Narnia
from Season 3: The Great 2010 Comeback
"I went into my closet to get my coat, but all I found was Narnia..."
One of the one-liners from Season 3, Sam and Bailey are about to go outside, but Sam cannot find his coat because his closet has become Narnia.
#36: Formation of Drama Club
from Season IV
"Tell them that this school lacks the cultural aspect that only theatre can provide. Really inform them of what our mission is, how this can benefit all students seeking to better their education of performing arts, or for those with acting skills to hone their skills in the purest sense. We aim to entertain and to pass on knowledge."
"...So why do you want to start this club?"
"We want to put on plays and stuff."
Shannon, Frank, and Shannon aim to create a Drama Club for their school. When they need a representative on the Student Body Council to make a case as to why the school needs a Drama Club, Frank entrusts the responsibility to Sarah. After making a monologue about why the school needs this club, Sarah goes to the council and says nothing that Frank told her.
#35: Milkshakes
from Season Six
"Ah, false alarm, boys. That's a smoothie, not a milkshake."
Shannon makes herself a smoothie, only to find all the boys in her yard, mistakenly thinking that she was making milkshakes.
#34: Kenzie Dies
from Season 2 (subset "Harry Potter and the Wait for July 2009")
"She's dead. Voldemort killed her."
"That can't be right."
"What do you mean 'That can't be right?' She's dead."
Brian Griffin was not the first cartoon character to bite the dust. The final chapter of the "Harry Potter and the Wait for July 2009" subset involves Voldemort taking over and killing Kenzie. However, as Sam is still in control of the comics, Kenzie is brought back.
#33: Stanley the Giraffe/ Shannon and Frank Break-Up Story-Arc
from Season 7
"You need to make a choice. Me or the giraffe."
"She chose the giraffe."
This whole story arc was inspired by Shannon herself. I added the part with her and Frank splitting up though, but I knew it had to end with Stanley bringing them back together in the end.
#32: Itsy-Bitsy Spider
from Season 5 (subset "Without Sam")
"Down came my shoe and killed the spider dead."
Frank observes a spider crawling up the water spout. He improvs the rest of the song with his shoe instead of rain.
#31: Mythril Scissors
from Season 2
"Rock smashes scissors!"
"These are Mythril scissors."
Gimli and Legolas from Lord of the Rings engage in a rock, paper, scissors fight. Gimli cheats.
#30: Find the Needle in the Hay Stack
from Season 5 (subset "Camp Awesome")
"I may or may not die of blood loss right now."
As the first challenge of Camp Awesome, Frank cuts himself to find the needle in the hay stack. He cuts a major blood vein and bleeds out quite a bit, tanking him out of the competition and causing Ryan as captain to replace him with Jarvis.
#29: Zombies Attacking
from Season Six
"... a coat..."
Using the internet meme "Zombies are attacking! Quick, the object to your left is your weapon, what is it?", Ryan finds a kitchen knife, Sam finds a shovel, Carl finds a BB gun, Nick finds a baseball bat, but poor Molly only finds a coat.
#28: Kreacher
from Season 2 (subset "Harry Potter and the Wait for July 2009")
"The muggle is asking Kreacher for a favor. Kreacher will fake his own death to avoid answering."
"The effect wouldn't have been better even if you hadn't said it aloud."
Kreacher briefly showed up in the Wait for July 2009 subset, but his best moment was when Sam asked him to do something for him.
#27: Set Fire to the Rain
from Season IV
"I don't care what Adele says, this doesn't work!"
Kenzie finds Sam out in the rain with a lighter.
#26: Dropped Phone Calls
from Season 2
"... I don't mean like a date or anything..."
Sam asks Bailey if she wants to see a movie with him. Their phone call drops and Sam is left thinking that she doesn't want to go with him.
#25: ELMO WANTS HUGS!
from Season 3: The Great 2010 Comeback
"It's not THAT scary..."
Sam, Kenzie, and Bailey enter a haunted house, where the sisters are scared by paper skeletons and bed sheet ghosts. Sam is scared by a life-sized Elmo who tries to hug him.
#24: Downton Abbey
from Season Six
While everyone enjoys watching Superbowl Sunday, Sam, Gabri, and Caroline are in the other room watching a new episode of Downton Abbey.
#23: Breaking Sam's Fourth Wall
from Season 5 (subset "Without Sam")
"That was every bit as fun as I thought it would be."
When he finds out that Sam has gone and left him, Shannon, and Bailey in charge, Frank immediately abuses his power by taking a sledgehammer to Sam's "Fourth Wall".
#22: Forrest Gump
from Season IV
"My Momma always said 'Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get.'"
"You know there's a key in the inside of the lid, right?"
Sam reminisces of the time he had to wait for a bus in Alabama, where he met Forrest Gump.
#21: Meme Face
from Season 5 (subset "When Movies Become Reality")
"Your face! It's a meme face!"
"This is my regular face."
"Can't you do another one?"
"NO."
"Gah! That's even worse!"
When Shannon accidentally opens a Troll vortex, everyone starts becoming memes. None is more hilarious than when she discovered Frank having a Rage Comic face.
#20: Gordon Ramsey
from Season IV
"It didn't help that Gordon Ramsey was dining at the table next to us..."
One of the few times the movie adaptation of the series is mentioned in the comics, Gabri asks why Sam and Bailey aren't dating anymore. Sam explains that they went on one date that didn't go well because Gordon Ramsey was sitting next to them.
#19: Illegally Blonde
from Season IV
"That was WAY too much chloroform, Molly."
"Gets the job done, though."
What started out as Gabri trying to make a statement about how hair color doesn't have anything to do with personality turned south when she and Bailey dyed their hair brown. Gabri only used temporary dye, but Bailey wasn't aware of this and used permanent dye. The only way they could calm her down afterwards was to knock her out and dye her hair blonde again.
#18: I BELIEVE I CAN FLY
from Season 5 (subset "Camp Awesome")
"She could die on impact!"
The most intense moment of Season 5, when Sarah flies into the air and begins falling to her death. She is rescued last second when the two teams of the camp work together to catch her.
#17: Hurricane Bailey
from Season 2
"What's wrong with him? Is he queazy at the sight of blood?"
"No, he just ate at the cafeteria earlier."
When Sam accidentally sends Bailey into a flash hurricane, she gets hospitalized. Several hospital-themed jokes follow.
#16: She Loves Me (Not)
from Season 2
"Rats..."
Based on true events, Sam begins picking the pedals off a flower. He ends up with only one pedal left, which can only be "she loves me not".
#15: Finale
from Season 7
"Take a good look around, Sam. Everyone here didn't come for Audrey. They came here for you."
Saying goodbye is always hard. I took this as an opportunity to go crazy. To go out with a bang.
#14: Frank's Sacrifice
from Season Six (subset "When Movies Become Reality")
"Only you can stop the rift... keep calm and prosper..."
When the only hope of stopping the rift that causes the real world to merge with the movie world is threatened, Frank selflessly exposes himself to lethal radiation to fix it. He then dies a hero's death, mimicking Spock's death in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Don't worry, through time travel, Frank is saved.
#13: Dense and Intense
from Season IV
"What did you put?"
"I just wrote that they are dense and intense."
When asked to describe a cloud formation in meteorology class, Sam and his classmates make a rhyming answer. Based on true events.
#12: Trust Fall
from Season Six
"What the heck, Nick?!"
"Sorry! I trusted that you would actually fall towards me!"
Sarah surprises Nick with a trust fall. She falls away from him, however.
#11: Gabri Wins at Life
from Season IV
"Jarvis, please escort them out and then throw rocks at them."
Money corrupts. When Gabri wins the lottery, she goes to live in a mansion with a butler named Jarvis. Sam tries to convince her to come back, but it's only when Ryan admits that he truly misses her that she gives up her money and her house to come back. She keeps Jarvis, though.
#10: Titanic
from Season 5
"Is it so bad that I only cried at the very end AFTER everything had already happened?"
"You cried harder at the end of 'Toy Story 3'!"
"What is wrong with you?!"
When Sam admits to never having seen Titanic, Bailey and Shannon force him to sit down and watch it with them.
#9: The Death of Michael Jackson
from Season IV
"It's a shame he overdosed."
"I thought his doctor killed him."
"No, 'Glee' killed him."
A comic that exploded on Tumblr, Sam, Bailey and Gabri speculate on the true death of the King of Pop.
#8: Baby Training
from Season 3: The Great 2010 Comeback
"Don't judge me."
When Sam realizes that he is growing up, he begins to panic about getting married and having children. He starts to carry around a bag of flour as "practice" for when he has a child. He gets overly attached to it and names it Siobhan. In the end, Bailey babysits Siobhan and Molly accidentally uses it to make cookies. This joke later returned in Season IV, but with Sarah.
#7: Jurassic Camp
from Season Six (subset "When Movies Become Reality")
"Mother of Dang. That's a dinosaur."
A good chunk of the story for "Reality" was when Sam, Kenzie, Molly, and Gabri try to find Bailey at Camp Awesome, which because of the Movie Rift, has become Jurassic Camp. Dinosaurs get lose and chase them all around until Elino arrives just in time to rescue them.
#6: If I Jumped in front of a Train
from Season IV
"If I jumped in front of a train for you, I would die. And you would be watching my blood spurt everywhere and we wouldn't be in love anymore, because I would be DEAD."
"Sometimes love just hurts, Frank."
A running joke in Season IV had characters listening to the radio and making comments on how ridiculous the lyrics are. This one was the most popular, when Frank tells Shannon why he would never jump in front of a train for her.
#5: The Ballad of Sarah Drinking Dr. Pepper
from Season IV
"Moon walking upside down in midair..."
"Okay. Now I'm worried."
This miniset of comics was based loosely on reality. When Sarah drinks Dr. Pepper, she goes wild and gains super-human abilities until the effects wear off.
#4: Doctor Elino
from Season 7
"Did I mention that my bookbag is also a TARDIS?"
I had been sitting on this reveal for a long time, and I could not wait to release it. I decided to wait until the final installment to let it loose, however to make the reveal the best it could be.
#3: Stupid Leprechauns
from Season IV
"Look! A pot at the end of the rainbow!"
Sam and Frank discover a pot at the end of a rainbow, only to find it filled with skittles.
#2: My Little Mermaid
from Season IV
"Wait, Mermaid tears are magical? Dang, crying really could get me anything I want."
Shannon's wish of becoming a Mermaid is granted... until she is captured by Blackbeard on his quest to find the Fountain of Youth. It's up to Sam, Gabri, Jarvis, Ryan, and Joel to find her before she is killed.
#1: I Went to B.S.
from Season 7
"I went to B.S. before coming here."
"What?"
"Business School."
"(...) What did you learn in Business School?"
"A lotta bull s***, really..."
I'm not saying this is the funniest joke ever, but it is a personal favorite of mine simply because of how true it was to me and Amelia in real life.
